Tomorrow marks 13 years since my mama went home. Over that 13 years, I've been a lot of things. I've been morose. I've wallowed in self pity; I've created an ornament swap, that this year swelled to over 130 participants, in her honor. I've talked to Hayley and Brian about her... a lot. I've tried to live up to the example by which she led. And mostly, I've fallen short.
But for tonight, rather than think about those things... rather than dwell on how much I miss my mom, I'm choosing to celebrate her.
Mom was always good for a silly little saying. Do you remember was "Member, FDIC?" TicTac candies were "Emtacs." We'd go fishing and she'd sing "Come on little fishie and bite my hook," or "Did you ever go a-fishin' on a bright sunny day, sit on the banks and watch the little fishies play, with your hands in your pockets and your pockets in your pants, watch the little fishies do the hoochie-coochie dance." She even swore in silly-speak. I swear the worst word I ever heard her say was "shithook." And she could throw shade like no other. She definitely had the "bless his heart" down pat! But my all-time favorite, and one I still use to this day, was "if brains were cotton, he wouldn't have enough to make an ant a tampon."
If you know me at all then you know my hair is completely unmanageable. Like, completely, completely unmanageable. So my mom dried my hair. Seriously, until I was 18, she dried my hair. She would have me bring a chair into the bathroom, she would back into a spot next to me and dry and style my hair. And I would grouse. Because, really, what self-respecting 18 year old wants their mama to fix their hair? So this one time, I was grousing and complaining and I jumped up out of that chair knowing full well she couldn't come after me real fast. Well, she ripped that hair dryer out of the wall and brandished that thing like a whip! Needless to say that was the last time I tried to make a break for it.
As a family, we often would play a game after a big dinner when the whole group of us were there. We'd often play men against women, and my favorite was Cranium. I have some great stories from this including the time my mom (after a margarita or two) played the charade card of belly dancing. But I digress. The point of this one is to say my grandpa used to get irate when playing this with us. As a team, my mom and I were unstoppable. Seriously, she'd draw a straight line in the picture part and I'd scream, "aardvark." And lo and behold, it'd be an aardvark. We were just that in tune with one another.
When I moved to California, my mom had a 1-800 line installed so we'd never miss a day of talking to each other. And we didn't. I don't think we missed very many in 31 years. She was my best friend, hands down. And, every day, I miss her. But I know I carry her with me wherever I go. She's watching me. I'm sure she's seen some things that would've made her want to snatch a knot in my butt. But I hope she's seen some things that made her say, "that's my girl."
So today, I celebrate her. I bought some orange Emtacs, and maybe I'll convince Brian and Hayley to play Cranium later.
